therapist and horomones!!!!!!¡!

I just realized i havent told you all my name. well honestly im having a hard time deciding (still on cell sorry for errors) between Allison (Allie for short) or Nicole (Nikki as an alternate) i like them both and im also attatched to the other versions more.( i like having a shorter or alternate type of name instead of using the actually name for some reason) im leaning more towards Allie but idk . anyway ive been seeing a therapist lately and talking with her about being trans and transitioning. After a few months of talking about how i was going to proceed i finally got my letter of approval to undergo HRT (Horomone replacement therapy) !!!! im soooo excited and scared at the same time. excited bc it will help me look and feel more feminine! However i am also scarred bc i still haven't told my parents about me going through with being trans and i know im going to have to tell them bc i need thier support in all of this. I just don't know how to tell them in a way that they'll understand that this isn't a choice nor something that should be looked at like a "problem" bc in my eyes the only problem (and regret) is that i took this long to finally sort and get on track.. however in all honesty i wasnt ready for the challanges back in my teen years (wish i was but i wasnt). Part of me wants to just show them this blog so that maybe it can help explain things and how i feel without being interrupted or haveing my words twisted. but then again maybe the things on this blog can be twisted into the wrong way as well. Any way so after i got the letter i was literrally soo happy that i after i put the letter in an envelope (so it doesnt get wrinkled) i put my headphones in and started singing and dancing out loud all over my apartment not careing who walked in! After that i immediatly contacted the nearest healthcare provider that could oversee HRT for M2F trans. (which is unfortunaly a city about 8 hours away. basically bc the one doctor in town that can isn't takeing any new patients curently.) they let me know all the tests i need to get before the first visit which is when i immediatly called my family doctor and asked to be sceduled for a full blood panel. (which at the time i didnt realize how many differnt tests consited of a full blood panel so he insisted we talk in person) i visited with my family doctor 3 days ago and we talked about the tests i need (I of course told him that im trans bc it would be stupid and pointless not to tell him) he then schduled me for multiple tests and also a recheck of my thyroid (ill go into detail why he wanted to check my thyroid on a differnt post.. its kind of humiliating.) the following day i got the tests done at my local womens health center (typically womens health centers have cheaper rates and when it comes to lab work they dont care about gender.) they told me that my results will come late friday or early monday which they will then fax it immediatly to my family doctor. So hear i am friday morning up really early bc i just cant sleep XD. once these test results come in i am calling the clinic in the other city to set up an appointment so that i can finally get on horomones. hope nothing goes wrong *fingers crossed* well i think i will end this post there (also this is probly going to be the only day i do this many posts basically bc its new. but i will be most likely blogging daily once i get the hang of this whole blogging thing! <3  )